An early year reflection
I have written -well started- several blog posts since the year began. And initially, I was very invested in them as well! But WHOOPS!! None of them have seen the light of day. I’m tired. Mentally, emotionally, yadda yadda yadda. But you know what else?
I’m thirsty. PARCHED.
I want to change. Not like to someone else, but TO MYSELF. Does that make sense? Stay with me.
I feel like I’ve been chasing something unattainable. Something other people are doing, other people’s dreams. I’ve been frustrated with my posts, my choices; unsatisfied with how my stuff looks… because they don’t feel like me.
I look to others for guidance and inspiration, but maybe that’s not something that works for me. Maybe trying to work towards this specific picture in my head while using someone else as my reference isn’t working. I need to know what’s best for me by looking at myself first and foremost.
Changing My Ways
I really had to go back to my roots for this one. The roots in questions: figuring out what I actually liked.
Sounds… questionable. How do I not know what I like?? Well, we live in a digital world where everything is secretly an advertisement trying to appeal to us. We’re literally being influenced almost every minute of the day. But that’s not productive, it’s distracting. And for me? It was confusing. I was starting to mix up what were my genuine interests and hobbies to what’s currently trending, popular and everywhere. So I did some thinking.
What are my favorites colors? What kind of styles do I actually like? What kind of books do I like to read? Etcetera, etcetera, etcetera.
By asking myself these things and understanding myself better because of it, I am more confident in my choices and passions. But also, I am more clearer in things I don’t like or more neutral towards.
I’m still figuring things out and I’m still not very articulate with explaining my process of thinking, but I’m hopeful that this reflection I’ve been doing will help me to create and embrace the lifestyle that I desire. And I hope that my own style and flair will start to shine more clearly in my posts as well. I want my work to reflect me, to feel like me. I’m working on it and I’m getting there.
What’s this about Whimsy?
So! Recently, I saw this post on Threads about what whimsy things women do to keep their lives interesting and it inspired me. I want to do more fun things in my life that feel special to me! I want to do the same with my hobbies as well. I think that adding some whimsical flair to your life is a beautiful thing and it can easily be something magical that reminds you how unique you are.
I want make some of my own and I want to be proud of it. It’s still a learning curve and I’m going to stumble and get lost, but I’m so very committed. I… don’t really have much else to say here ahaaa, but shout out to the first blog post of the year!
Thank you all as always, for the continued ears and support, I’m working to improve so please continue to cheer me on. I will do the same!
The Thread Posts btw:
https://www.threads.net/@thekatelynmattson/post/DF21hZwOP4G?xmt=AQGzJmL3shNMnHx2iIk8Z6qKnLGg0NYIhIWnAyWIzZnOkg
https://www.threads.net/@stynalane/post/DF6tbnPtBpw?xmt=AQGz_skZRDuHiKwa6hw4z1ndqP8oe6qZLqMswPTjUHn7Tw
Sundai Paper 
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